Based. Bernanke.

"Pragmatic" is the highly anticipated debut album by President Barack Obama. After rumors began circulating tonight over possible tracklistings for the upcoming album, POTUS44 decided to end the speculation by posting the official shortly after Monday’s presser on Iraq and Ferguson

Tracklist:

1. Kaveat King
2. 44 Qualifiers
3. Same Same But Different
4. Mas o Menos
5. Risk-A-Verse
6. However. Although. Perhaps
7. Maybe. Maybe Not
8. Let Me Be Clear Yet Not Get Too Ahead of Myself
9. P. I. C (Pragmatist in Chief)
10. 01.20.17
11. What More Can I Say? (Seriously)
12. Grey Hair Don’t Care
13. Danny Glover
14. Hot Yet Cold / Up And Down / Lost But Found



BASED.

"Pragmatic" is the highly anticipated debut album by President Barack Obama. After rumors began circulating tonight over possible tracklistings for the upcoming album, POTUS44 decided to end the speculation by posting the official shortly after Monday’s presser on Iraq and Ferguson

Tracklist:

1. Kaveat King
2. 44 Qualifiers
3. Same Same But Different
4. Mas o Menos
5. Risk-A-Verse
6. However. Although. Perhaps
7. Maybe. Maybe Not
8. Let Me Be Clear Yet Not Get Too Ahead of Myself
9. P. I. C (Pragmatist in Chief)
10. 01.20.17
11. What More Can I Say? (Seriously)
12. Grey Hair Don’t Care
13. Danny Glover
14. Hot Yet Cold / Up And Down / Lost But Found

BASED.

Blackstone To Buy Stake in Versace, Continue Industry Push for 'Medusa head on me like I'm 'luminati'

The deal, first reported by The Financial Times, is the latest in a series of private equity investments in fashion over the past year.

Blackstone and the family-owned Versace have declined to comment on the deal.

However, sources suggest that deal-makers have all but mandated “Versace” by Migos to be “turnt the fuck up” in the firm’s lobby and elevators.  Blackstone, whose shares are up 1% since news broke, have allegedly changed their on-hold music to “Versace” as well.

Key executives involved in the deal valuing Versace at 1.1 billion euros say that Blackstone leadership has mentioned, “Fuck all your feelin’s cause business is business, its strictly financial.”  They went on to say, “I’m always the first one to get it, man that’s how you lead by example”

SWERVE.

Across the pond, the Versace family, also pressed for details about the potential deal, responded that “This is a gated community please get the fuck off the property.”

They later added:  ”VERSACEVERSACEVERSACEVERSACEVERSACE”

BASED

Facebook has agreed to purchase messaging giant WhatsApp in deal worth $19 billion.

In a blog post, Facebook cited WhatsApp’s growing user base that has topped 450 million (70% are active daily) and messaging volume nearly as large as the entire global telecom SMS volume.

COTDAMN.

WhatsApp will remain based in Mountain View and operate independently of Facebook’s core messaging service.

Sources are suggesting, however, that Mark Zuckerberg, last seen partying with Jeezy #itstheworld, has major plans for the nearly ubiquitous mobile messaging app 

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In an effort to drive additional engagement (re: GUAP), an advertising partnership with Bud Light is in the works followed by a subsequent name-change to *wait for it wait for it*

WHAT$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$APP

In a presumed shout-out to the IRONYBASEDGAWDS, Zuckerberg accidentally tweeted (yes, tweeted) the above video which suggests intense negotiations between Facebook and What$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$App executives.

Despite the news, Facebook is trading lower after-hours

BA$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ED

Ben Bernanke Deserves Our Appreciation : The New Yorker

Ben Bernanke Deserves Our Appreciation : The New Yorker

cnbc:

If you didn’t get a chance to submit an answer, tweet @CNBC with hashtag #ByeBernanke and we’ll add it to the Storify. 

DETAILS: http://cnb.cx/1lmH2AI

BASED.

R V R E way to reimburse friends. Stay woke, PayPal and Venmo #bandz #mancation #based (at The Mission)

R V R E way to reimburse friends. Stay woke, PayPal and Venmo #bandz #mancation #based (at The Mission)

Bernanke Delivers Final Speech as Fed Chairman, Drops Mic

The Honorable Based Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke delivered his final prepared speech, The Federal Reserve: Looking Back, Looking Forward”.  Likely channeling The Life & Times of S. Carter Vol. 3, he reflected on his tenure and what rests ahead for the U.S. economy.

The speech, which covered three main areas, transparency and accountability, financial stability and reform, and monetary policy, is, for all practical purposes, a America-you-are-welcome-multi-trillion-dollar-mic-drop.  And, deservedly so.

(Full video available at C-SPAN)

On transparency and accountability…

We took extraordinary measures to meet extraordinary economic challenges, and we had to explain those measures to earn the public’s support and confidence. Talking only to the Congress and to market participants would not have been enough. The effort to inform the public engaged the whole institution, including both Board members and the staff.

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On financial stability measures during the Great Recession…

"The Federal Reserve responded forcefully to the liquidity pressures during the crisis in a manner consistent with the lessons that central banks had learned from financial panics over more than 150 years and summarized in the writings of the 19th century British journalist Walter Bagehot: Lend early and freely to solvent institutions"

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On financial reform to avoid future aforementioned crises…

"More broadly, the approach to regulation and supervision at the Federal Reserve has evolved to include a substantial macroprudential, or systemic, orientation in addition to the traditional focus on individual institutions. For example, the Federal Reserve created the Office of Financial Stability Policy and Research, which coordinates System efforts to monitor the interaction of financial institutions, financial markets, and economic developments to identify emerging vulnerabilities and systemic risks."

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On monetary policy…

"For the most part, research supports the conclusion that the combination of forward guidance and large-scale asset purchases has helped promote the recovery. For example, changes in guidance appear to shift interest rate expectations, and the preponderance of studies show that asset purchases push down longer-term interest rates and boost asset prices. These changes in financial conditions in turn appear to have provided material support to the economy.”

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What can’t be lost amid this series of pragmatic, yet bold, and, what I believe history will determine as successful actions is that they were made 1) during the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression and 2) with a BATSHITCRAZY Congress in the proverbial post-crisis driver seat.

For that alone, Ben Bernanke can drop all the mics.  Mix-in the aforementioned efforts of the Federal Reserve during his tenor, and, well…

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BASED

Survey: 9 out of 10 Fortune 500 CEO’s pledge to push envelope in 2014

Building upon a year record-breaking stock performance and significant growth in corporate cash piles, CEO’s of our largest companies are boasting increased ‘Out-of-the-Box’ thinking to accelerate growth in 2014.

Enhanced focus on what they describe as 'low-hanging fruit' and continued investments in Big Data are fostering optimism among our nation’s business leaders as we begin the new year

We’ve captured additional insight from the best and brightest of our nation’s private sector from a survey in today’s Wall Street Journal.

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This corresponding lack of bullshit and glut of meaningful words constructed to form sentences has investors swimming in optimism as thick as Double Dare Gak.

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Our 2014 prediction for corporate earnings?

Less of this:

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More of this:

BASED